An emotional day

I am emotionally exhausted!!! Yesterday was quite the day for me. Sundays are usually hard for me especially when Brandon is not home. Trying to get the family ready without fighting and out the door is an exhausting task on its own. I had been anticipating this sacrament meeting for 2weeks now. I was told that we were going to be having a "Testimony of Music" sacrament meeting. I was so excited. For those of you who don't know already.....I LOVE music. It really is my life calling. Oh' speaking of....I got my 3rd calling 2 weeks ago as the Ward Choir President. What that entails I am still learning, but I am over the choir, how it functions, getting members, choosing the songs, the special performances....etc. I didn't think it was that big of a deal, til Sunday. I already had 2 callings, Sunday school teacher for the 12-13yr olds and Stake Young Women's Music Director. Well, sacrament meeting was a hit. I always feel the spirit with music. Lots of different music brings the spirit, not just church music. So, people got up and bore their testimony about a song and then we would sing it. The Bishop had warned me that as Choir Pres. I had to choose my favorite hymn and sing it on the 20th of this month as a choir, only thing is I would NEVER get through it. SO, I opted to sing it as a congregation.

16yrs ago on May 10th, my sister was killed in a one car rollover. Her car rolled off the road at mile marker 219 in northern Utah. That happened to be her favorite hymn. #219 Because I Have Been Given Much. I have been given so many blessings in my life and in turn this too is now my favorite hymn to sing***well, cry through*** LOL. The knowledge and testimony of the Plan of Salvation gained through that trial is a blessing in itself. I have a testimony that through our trials and tests in this life, we gain knowledge and wisdom.

In Relief Society, our lesson was on Baptism. This too, is a sensitive topic for me. It made me reflect on a lot of baptisms that are so special to me. First and foremost, MY baptism day is always so special to me. To remember my Dad standing with arms outstretched in the water beckoning me to come and take his hand, is very vivid in my mind. I remember my Mom being in the dressing room waiting there with a towel in hand. She wrapped me up like a tight little burrito and squeezed me. I remember the whisper in my ear...."I am so proud of you, Jamie" I will never forget. That moment in time frozen in my mind. The next one I remember is Brandon's baptism day. So many of his family members where in attendance. He had just turned 18. I can remember the spirit that was there was incredibly strong. What an example he was to them all. His dear friend Billy Brewer was there, who is now our neighbor in Utah. I can remember Jenna's who's was just this last August. What a sweet little spirit she has. I know that she was so excited for this day, as many of us are growing up in the gospel. She looked so pure, so precious, so clean. There was only one other boy baptized with her that day, Tyler Young. She had lots of family there to support her. I often think of many other baptisms that I have attended throughout my life. Like Kim Haddix. A friend of mine in High School that came from a very dysfunctional family filled with abuse, drugs and violence. After just 2 weeks of knowing her, she came and lived with us, was introduced to a whole new life, and accepted the gospel. Just a few days after the death of Becky, she moved back to Missouri with her Mother (by then she had left her husband). We lost contact for a few years and I missed her. I had a longing to see where she was in her life. I had an urge to find her. I dreamt one night that I found her and we hugged. The itch was on to find her. I felt it was soooo important. When all my attempt failed I called my brother-in-law, who is in law enforcement and asked if he could do anything to help. A few hours later I got a call a very sober voice on the other end. I still remember the conversation. It was about Feb. 8th a few years back. He said "Jamie, why do you want to find Kim so bad." I said "I don't know what it is, but I feel like I need to find her." Silence filled the phone. He spoke and the words haunted me. He said, "Jamie, Kim was killed in a pedestrian accident last year on Feb. 11th. It has almost been a year now. I am so sorry." I just cried. I then knew WHY I HAD to find her. The spirit prompted me to find out this news. I needed to now do her temple work. It was almost one year to the day. Just a few years ago, I had the opportunity to do Kim's temple work. I know she is happy and sharing the gospel to those on the other side.
SO..........I had a very emotional Sunday to say the least!!!! But, sometimes we need those days. Days to help us reflect on the blessings we sometimes forget about or often take for granted.